We don’t believe you. You need more people… Nobody can read you dudes like we do.
First I would like to start with the “hoe-ass” reference that was made throughout your blog. I did call you a hoe-ass (I think it was more of hoe-bag because that makes more sense, but that is somewhat irrelevant). This came about when I found out last week that you slept with ______ shortly after him and I ended things last year. Out of anger, some words were said to [him] through text messages the night of the fashion show. I apologize for that comment because it was disrespectful, but was a reference that had nothing to do with your sexuality (because I know nothing about your personally), but at the time it was all I could come up with.
First, I would like to start with the fact that your email got me hot. My brother used to say that: “hot”. Like… “That shit got me hot,” and I had forgotten all about the usage until now. I’m bringing it back because it was the first time I actually felt it. Not only did you irk me, but you literally raised my body temperature and, honestly, I don’t need that in my life. & If someone can do that to do, I have to do something about it. I see you are well written. Your employment of ethos and pathos were effective but there was a greatly apparent lack of logos. I thank your friend for showing you my blog, for that was the ultimate purpose of my leaving the card and publishing a post accordingly. & If you read the last one again (and I read all of my blogs at least 5 times) you’ll see that I acknowledged your Range because I thought you had one… I don’t know if perhaps you downgraded to a Toyota…. I’m not interested in what you drive. It was simply added in for detail. With that said, you can see how even when given all the information, one can choose to see what they want to see. I call it “selective-give-a-fuck.” You see, you’ve confused the placement of my fuck. My fuck lies not with the boy you’re fawning over (FYI: if you didn’t still want him, you wouldn’t be so upset with him & who/what he does on his personal time… a year ago at that) rather it lies in the ultimate fact that you had the gaul to say my name out of your mouth. My name wasn’t made for your mouth. You should have never trusted that boy… or the others, for that matter.
Hopefully you can understand where I am coming from. I am adult enough to admit to my mistakes, but you made some mistakes as well. I do not want this situation to be escalated in any way because caddy fights like this are unnecessary. I do however, want you to know that you have publicly humiliated me and allowed for others who were not informed of these claims to publicly humiliate me as well.
There will be no private apology on my behalf. Anything I say in private, I am just as comfortable saying over a loudspeaker. It’s a pity you don’t feel the same way. You claim that with my last post I, “publicly humiliated” you but I feel as though you fail to see where the humiliation stems from. Is it the things I said or simply the fact that I said things out loud? What was “humiliating”? You’re actions? Or is it the fact that people have caught onto your extra curricular activities? Is it the tone in which I addressed you or the fact the everyone is free to witness me “son” you? Wherein lies the humiliation? I think this is a very important factor in assigning me any wrong-doing.
Not only am I adult enough to admit my mistakes, but I’m solid enough in maturity and have enough faith in my decisions that I will not surrender to the white flags flown disguising an ambush. Everyone already knew about you. This is nothing new. Just because it’s your first time hearing about yourself doesn’t mean that the rest of the public hadn’t been “informed”. I’m going to tell you the truth… I don’t care anymore… and this topic has grown to bore me. But before I call it quits, I want you to know the truth. No one asks about you. You come up. If ever you are mentioned, if ever you walk by, if ever there is a compliment said about you, it is immediately followed by “yea, but she’s a hoe.” #Fact. This is how most people learn who you are. That is how people talk about you behind your back. “Hoe” is now a characteristic used to introduce you to new people. This isn’t me talking… it’s simply the general outlook on you. You might think this is “malicious” and I’m sorry you had to find out this way, but no one else has the balls to tell you and apparently you have the tendency to cry and fit when conversation gets serious so this could never happen in person or on the phone. At least I found a way to address you directly.
Nothing happened between me and lets be real, these are references are about the basketball team (as well as others Im sure). In fact, I was good friends with one particular person, the one who is notorious for taping his sex acts, therefore I was seen inside his apartment several times. Our relationship ended when he started making sexual advances and I have not been seen with or talked to him since. I have been defending my reputation for over a year now and you writing this blog with malicious insults, has only further hurt me. I have never in my life sent pictures to anyone, boyfriend, or not. I have never in my life been a part of a video or been associated with someone who makes videos. I have publicly confronted the individuals that claim that they have slept with me, and when their “boys” are not around, they admit the truth (the friends you mentioned who wiped away my tears were there to witness this). Of course, in front of their teammates, or friends, they will tell anyone who wants to hear that we slept together. There are several girls on this campus who have been victims to this same situation. There are “men” on this campus who have claimed to have slept with several individuals even though it is not true. What hurt me the most was how adamant you were about these videos existing. There is no evidence because you stated you have not seen them and there is no possible way that anyone else has seen them since they do not exist. You can say whatever you want about me, as you already have, but making comments like that are very hurtful.
I’ll take your word for truth. I’m posting it here for everyone to see that you’ve defended yourself. Unfortunately, your defense sounds like it’s been dipped in bullshit. Twice. If it is true, I apologize. But since you say it’s true, I assume it’s no problem to post your words here. This way, your defense is as public as the accusations made against you. I’ll be honest: The most challenging thing for myself and my friend to understand is this: who the fuck you think you are to think you have license to say anything about anyone? You can count my Loyola “escapades” on a handicapped hand. You can count my hoe tendencies with a closed fist. If you don’t want people to talk about you, don’t talk about anyone else. In the public eye, you are too easy of a female *cough* I mean, target. You might have been fighting to defend your reputation for over a year now… but you’ve had that reputation for a lot longer than that, doll. The reason you have less room to speak about anyone is because you’re habitually in the hoe category –whether the stories are true or not. But the fact that there are stories is what leads me to believe that you’re lying. Granted, you might not have slept with all those boys… but you have to understand how hard it is to believe that none of them got in it. You can call my writing insulting if you’d like, but do you think it’s any less insulting for you to make comments “in confidence” to two people who were honestly trying to be nice to you? That was fucked up, to say the least.
In my opinion, your comment made at the fashion show came across as fake simply because you and I have never spoken and I was under the impression that you did not like me. You have always been somewhat cold towards me and that could have been misinterpreted, but the vibes I got from you said you just didn’t like me. When you made that comment I was honestly surprised and thats why I said it was fake.
This, here, is a problem you have in common with your fellow Loyola girls. –& everyone knows I associated with very few over my college career. You seek too much attention from too many people. You expected me to kiss you ass and, sorry, I’m simply not qualified for that. All this tells me, is that you’d have preferred it if I was fake to you from the start. I only spoke to you when I needed to. When I had something to say. I’m not sure what else you expected from me but it was obviously too much. What did you want to talk about? What should I have said. Think about it? What was our conversation supposed to be? The only times I saw you, you were walking to wherever you were going and so was I. I had shit to do & I assume the same of you. When I saw you outside of class time, you were either or engaged in a conversation or laid up with someone. My follow up question: What was I supposed to think? I had heard the stories & what I saw in public simply made it possible. What I was told in private simply made it more plausible. I don’t know anything about you except for what I saw. & when you put what I saw & what other people saw combines with the things “they” say….it’s not the prettiest picture. Then you decided to say my name out your mouth.
Can’t you see? You brought this all upon yourself.
I don’t mean this to be rude, but I really never gave a… umm… not sure there’s another word but.. a fuck about you. You didn’t affect my life. So I apologize if I didn’t take the time out to get to know you. I was busy graduating. You also can’t blame me. If you look at my circles, I surround myself with females whose reputations precede them less than yours. I apologize. Not only for not getting to know you, but for what you’ve been through with these men. But then again, if you paid attention to your own actions half as much as you paid attention to my “fakeness,” you’d have had a lot less drama in your life.
I don’t doubt you think it’s even more malicious that I’ve come back with round two via blog but heyyy. You submitted to my blog email which gives me full rights to anything you said. & I’d like for the readers to know what you said word-for-word. We don’t run off hear-say on this blog. I’m not sure what you thought I’d do. Email you back an apology? Be your friend? Shut up for one? Maybe I’d feel bad? Well, I do pity you, I’ve said that time & time again… but I never regret anything I say. Obviously, you don’t know me. & I don’t “make up” stories, contrary to what you think. If you think you matter enough to me for me to sit around mad make up stories… you are highly confused. Brittany already said it, but I, too, couldn’t give a fuck less who you part your legs for. This is purely entertainment. I do this for my fans 😉 Thank you for material, doll .
The several references you made to these pictures and videos are surprisingly to me. As a black female who once attended Loyola, I am surprised you fell for that. There are too many “men” out there who want to act like they’ve slept with thousands of women, when in reality, its nothing close to that, and instead, they ruin people’s reputations. I have not slept with the majority of the individuals that claim that I have been in their beds….
I understand your points but please don’t try to defend my honor. I’ve got that covered. You and I are not alike. Just because we were both Black females on Loyola’s campus does not make us one in the same. You can tell from a mile away that you and I are of different breeds. The tone of your skin doesn’t make us “alike”. You claiming that we are one in the same lumps me into a category I’d rather not be part of. So if anyone asks about me and my dealings, feel free to give them my number. Tell them to call me. I make sure to address all fans, haters and envious females directly. If they don’t have my number, obviously they don’t know me. Which brings me around ot the fact that you don’t know me, which is why I was caught so off guard by you mentioning my name. I just feel like you have nothing to add to a conversation about me. Additionally, I’m not ashamed of the things I’ve done or the men I’ve been with. & They’ve never disrespected me. You and I are one two different boats. & yours has had a slow leak for quite some time. As a Black female who once attended Loyola, it saddens me that women take all their anger out on these men. Please don’t pretend like you didn’t know what they are about. There are men on that team that I didn’t associate with even once because I felt like they had ulterior motives. When one starts a new conversation with me, it’s typically about how I never spoke to them before. & You’d never catch me coming out any of their rooms. Ever. I borrowed a book from one of them once & made sure someone came with me to pick it up. Is it really their fault that these girls are so easy? Do you really think they you can be just friends with a man who is “notorious” for making sex videos? Oh like Superhead & Mr. Marcus right? Yea, they were friends, too. She was also friends with Ice Cube, Diddy, Jay-Z, Tyrese and many others. Popular girl, she was, huh?
As a Black female who once attended Loyola, I am blown away by the stories I hear. Even though I’m not really religious, I pray that you each find your way. Part of this is dedicated to you by yourself in hopes that you’ll watch your actions (and your mouth) so that you can clean up your reputation. A majority of this is simply to put out the shit that’s happening at Loyola –how thirsty the girls have become to throw themselves any which way. I agree, there are way too few men on Loyola’s campus but I’m sure all the females on our campus are bright women, but from some reason, you allow these men to walk all over you. Go ahead, sleep with whoever you want. Just do it privately. You don’t need to walk around and be seen with all of them. You also don’t have to pretend to be their girlfriends. More importantly, you probably shouldn’t try to be their girlfriends. They are college boys. They do what college boys do. & just because you allowed them in doesn’t make them disgusting. It makes them opportunistic: they simply take advantage of what comes their way.
“We are not the same. I am a martian.” – Lil Tunechi
When I spoke to ____ the other day, he said “I did not know about [her] sexual escapades.” My response was that “Its possible that she is in the same position that I am in. There could easily be other guys out there who have claimed to have slept with her, but that is not necessarily the truth.” Even though I was angry that you two slept together, I think you deserved to be defended because no one really knows the truth unless they were there.
My ultimate goal of this email was to apologize for the “hoe-ass” comment, but also tell you that the comments made about these “videos” and “pictures” are very disrespectful and uncalled for. I know nothing about your personal life or who you have had sex with on campus (aside from _____), but when things like that are brought to my attention, I think as a woman it is best to defend the other women who are targeted by the disgusting men on this campus.
When was the first time you heard something about yourself? Did you do anything about it? Are you still hanging around the same people? We all fall victim to how small our school is but there ‘s a great difference between you and I: My name doesn’t come up as often. It doesn’t matter what I’m doing. It doesn’t matter whether or not you have the details. All that matters in gossip is “I heard”. Your boy told you the truth and a lie at the same time: He knows nothing of my escapades, but whole time… he was my escapade. He’s not going to give you details, though. And neither will I. But I will say he didn’t treat me poorly & funny, he never mentioned you were his “girlfriend” unless you mean a “girl” that is a “friend”. & Simply said, he denied you. Vehemently. When it comes to you, no one truly knows the things you’ve done… but somehow, they are topic of conversation. & its never the same guy. It’s never the same two. Or the same three. & it’s not in one period. It’s not a particular time-frame. You are a recurring theme in Loyola’s hoe chronicles. *That, doll, is not my nor my friend’s fault. Please leave us out of your arguments.
What was so “disrespectful and uncalled for”? I didn’t take the pictures or videos. I haven’t seen them (I’m repeating myself from my last post because hopefully your selective-gave-a-fuck is working better today. It was wrong for me to put it out there that there are claims of it? I don’t even know who has them. But I’ve been told they exist. You need not worry… I doubt they’ll go public because those boys don’t want to get kicked out of school. But umm… I also can’t say they don’t exist. If you meant that (about defending other women) sincerely, I do appreciate it. But due to your reputation, you’re the absolute last person I need or want defending my honor. I wouldn’t have OJ defend me in court… although he might find a way to get me off. & really, that’s what you’ve tried to give me. You’ve tried to prep me with an excuse. With an escape. So that if/when you find out about me, I can latch onto your “unless you were there” story but I’m sincerely not interested. If at any point I am asked about my “escapades,” I’ll gladly answer questions. But… somehow I doubt you’ll hear about me from the horse’s mouth because I treat my horses way too well to garner any disloyalty, never mind disrespect. I’ll say flat out that I have no idea what is said about me behind closed doors. But I expect no one to defend me, for I have nothing to be ashamed up. Nothing to cover up. These boys don’t respect you. Here’s the thing, even if people are talking about me, I’ll never know it. I’m quite unsure of the number of people who would truthfully tell me about myself. You included.
The blame game ends here.
If you think people are talking about you, it’s your fault, not mines. Not anyones. They were talking about you waaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy before I published my post. If your boy doesn’t want to hang out with you, it’s your fault. Not saying there’s anything wrong with you as a person… you’re just not the one for him. You took on the victim role in your email and I understand why. You think I’lll feel bad about airing your laundry. I feel bad that you have laundry, but you can’t let that sit around for too long. I’m sorry you said the wrong name. I’m not the one. You may have gotten away with it in the past, but what goes around comes around. Remember, God don’t like ugly. & whatever humiliation I’ve caused for you, I’m sorry you had to feel that, but your actions are yours and no one elses. You should read Jean Paul Satre’s writings on Existentialism. He forces each of us to take responsibility for our own actions. If consequences arise, there is much you could have done to prevent it, but there is little you can do now. What you shouldn’t do, is place that blame on someone else. I had my rendezvous with your boy & they were quite fun. If he were to tell our stories, I wouldn’t be ashamed. He might. I’m not ashamed of having slept with anyone. I never called myself a saint. But if you take the time to #AskAboutMe, you’ll find out that the reason no one talks about me is because, I guarantee, they all hope for another try at it. From what I heard, you need lessons. I invite you to keep reading my blog. I can show you how to keep a man.
I have not spoken to _____ for a year (up until last week). I see _____ for who he really is, and I am just not interested. I have not been interested since before I left to go abroad. I have had a boyfriend for almost a year now so the comments you make that allude to me still being into him, are completely inaccurate. I do not know who your sources are, but its blatantly obvious that I want nothing to do with him despite his efforts to repair whatever it is we had. I can admit to my mistake in that sense, but I think you dedicating a 12 paragraph long blog to that one comment as well as made up stories, was below the belt.
Lucky you, you’ve gotten two “below the belt” posts dedicated to you. But please don’t get ahead of yourself. I talk about everything on here. From ants to apples to astronauts. Whatever tickles my fancy. What I won’t do is have a conversation about you behind closed doors without letting you know exactly what was said. With me, you don’t have to worry. & if it takes me a paragraph or 12, then so be it. I’ve got shit to say. & I say my shit publicly, unlike yourself. You said your dirt in confidence? Well, I only confide in myself. & I know there was more said because, in your email, you failed to mention somethings you were upset at, but I won’t bring that up because I’m not out to get you. I told you in the last post, I don’t mean to be malicious. Unfortunately (for you) your classmates read my blog. It ain’t my fault I’m entertaining. Writing is what I do. It’s what I did. It’s what I paid Loyola 50 grand a year for. So, please forgive me, but I’m going to write as much as I damned well please.
You must not have heard: I love drama.
& I’m glad you’ve found the “strength” to move on... but he’s not the issue here, between you & I, it’s you. It’s you overstepping your boundaries. Getting out of place. I accept your apology not for it’s sincerity, rather because it lets me know that you know that I’m not the one. I don’t like that shit. I don’t like when people have conversations about me because rarely do they say things to my face. I’m sorry, I had to make you the example, for I cannot have this become an ongoing action on my campus. I love my alma mater & am quite satisfied by the way I’m treated and seen there. I’m either loved or hated but never disrespected. And that’s exactly how I like it.
In the words of Miss Owens, “I didn’t know who you were. You were the girl who walked around with _______ .” You can decided what name to put there. But as you think about it, please take note of how many names fit
there. That is where you fucked up. We can’t say that you are a hoe. Problem is, we also can’t say that you’re not.
But in sum. You’re lying. And we all know it. But you’ve only got a couple months of Loyola left. Lay low. Keep it tight. & you’ll be all set.
Where’s the ref?
Somebody rule this a K.O.
I’m taking off my gloves.
Feel free to comment/email if you’d like… but I don’t want to hear anything if it’s not the truth. You weren’t genuine in your last email and I can feel it. What you want is for the talking to stop…. and it will, eventually. But you’re done at Loyola. You don’t have much longer to rectify your reputation. You’re a pretty girl. You’ll be fine. Just watch your mouth –not only by who’s names are coming out of them, but also from the people you are “confiding” in. I wouldn’t ask you to confide in me, but I will ask you to continue to read from time to time because I think you need some guidance. & if you trust these boys… you can’t go any worse by trusting me. For starters, read How Do I Know if I’m a Hoe? I told you I’ll blog on it all.
Bring me some water.