“Put those fuckin’ heels on and work it, girl. Let that mirror show you what you’re doing.” – Drake, Shut it Down
So, lets just put it out there… I’m an A cup. On a good day.
I admit that my small chest size used to bother me, especially when I was with my friends. Let’s put it this way: In our group of three, I have chest, one has breasts, the other has straight-up knockers.. or jugs… or… yea they’re big. “Jugs” and I had a conversation a little while ago about the bras available to us. “Mine come in black, tan, cream and pink,” she said to me. “Mine come as training bras in flowers and patterns,” I answered back. But, this is only if you don’t want to look for something “sexier”.
Confession: My ex hated my underwear. When we first met, I’d make an effort to wear something nice, but eventually I got lazy. I got comfortable in the worst way. I would sit on his couch in my all-white, Hanes “Her Way”‘s and fill out Sodoku puzzles. Whe I was with him, I swear I was 50. Now, this isn’t completely my fault. He said he didn’t care. The way it all started was that I would spend the night and have nothing to wear. Now, we wouldn’t go to Victoria’s Secret to pick up something new, we’d go to Walmart. At that point in my life, I felt like if a man wanted to see me in something special, he could spend his money on it.
But after he left me (LOL, that sounds so pathetic), my addiction to vengeance was fueled by one of those episodes on E! where they have an intervention for a fashionably lost soul. They took a woman lingerie shopping with the idea in mind that wearing lingerie makes you feel sexier. Even if it’s just for yourself. I decided to try it out, and I can’t even explain it, but I totally agree. The idea that if I were to take my clothes of right now I’d have a cute set on makes me feel more attractive… and, oddly enough, attracted to myself. Not to mention, it made me feel good to to theoretically throw a “look how sexy I am” my ex’s face. We all need some motivation, right?
I understand why he hated the Hanes, but I felt like he already thought I was pretty, so what I was wearing shouldn’t upset him, right? Wrong. When a man tells you something doesn’t bother him, (just because you don’t do it) he’s trying to convince you and himself at the same time. Men care. Why do you think they go to strip clubs? Those women wear the outfits you won’t. Even Jay-Z brags about his preference for women in pretty panties in Nigga Please: “you don’t be gettin no hoes with La Perla on they cheeks. Can’t be messin’ with cheap chicks… you seldom seen with chick in Seven Jeans [or] Manolo Blahnik…”
Underwear is the unseen portion of fashion-savvy woman. Since I can’t afford La Perla (and was too embarrassed to go into the Michigan Ave store when I was in Chicago), for now you can catch me in my Calvins. In Season 2; Episode 2 of Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami, the ladies go lingerie shopping at Journelle “cause Lamar’s coming to town and I need to look good for him,” Khloe explains. In Episode 4, in order to compete with his video games, Khloe dons a sheer teddy and does up her makeup… and honestly she looks damned hott. This is what a man wants to see, whether we, as women, want to accept it or not. I don’t doubt that when Khloe watched the reruns of the seasons, even she thought she looked hot.
If you don’t find yourself sexy, how can you expect anyone else to?
Here’s an article on “How to Wear Lingerie Alone” that explains how to pick out lingerie for yourself. Like I said, I’m an A Cup, but I know that a demi bra suits my size the best. I encourage you to find yours. Trust me ladies, when you concern yourself about yourself, no one else matters & everything revolving around your sexiness becomes a better experience. Buy something sexy and just look at yourself in the mirror. Take a picture. Go ahead. Sext. I mean, if the picture looks good, who cares if he shows it? Fuck it, make a slide show. A video. Whatever. Enjoy yourself. This is about you.
My point is this: Work it, Bitch. Always work it. Whether someone can see you or not.